my agonies......

today sudipta, my friend from college is getting married....quite literally speaking coz right at this moment maybe her actual tying the knot ceremony is going on......i had hoped to attend it....but i could not,not because i wasnt invited but because i came down with food poisoning.....this happens with me at all times,whenever i look forward to something, i end up not being able to take part in it at the end....talk about tough luck!!!!!i am feeling soo depressed.....all my frndz will be there and thay must be having a ball and i am stuck at home!!!!

introspection.....or something close to it

And I am back with all the gibberish that I had been storing up for all these days.......why are we so hard pressed for time????Makes me think about my school days......life then was so good.....the bus ride to school, the morning assemblies the classes we liked and loathed!!!!I still remember my last day at school,how our hearts skipped a beat when the final bell rang to the final class.....we looked at each other and mumbled- this is it.....the board exams,the long hard hours of study....the busting your back for a better future......all for what????Now at the fag end of student life,when I am just 6 months away from getting my final degree why is it that I do not feel satisfied???Why, still, I have doubts about what next???havent I done all that could possibly be done???I feel scared-just like that little girl who stepped into school for the first time,like that nineteen year old who stepped into a co ed college knowing not what to do next....scared even to ask someone where the depatment is.....now that I think of all those days I wonder how much I have grown.....and how much more I will have to grow up.....I will have to go away from my parents,earn my living,get married and most importantly have my own children.....hhmmmmppphhhh.....lots of work....and all I do is blog away.....grow up swati!!!!!lol